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Shyness Update

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(What we do with grocery bags.)

Not long ago, I asked for some advice about Nora’s shyness and if it was normal for a child her age or excessive.  I got a ton of comments, Facebook messages and emails, and I really appreciated all of them so much.  I think one of the things I most love about my online community is how supportive everyone is and how I know I can always count on you for honest thoughts and reassuring words.  I thought I would post a quick update on what’s going on for everyone who is interested.

After mulling over all of the comments, we ended up deciding to call Early Intervention to get an expert opinion — it seemed so much better than sitting around worrying and not knowing what I’m supposed to do as a parent.  They came this morning and spent three hours with us, playing with Nora and afterwards talking with us about the assessment.

Honestly, I had no idea what to expect from Nora during the meeting.  We had just had a different woman over to the house to talk with Chris and me, and Nora had cried the entire time, for over an hour and a half; I was both nervous and hopeful that she would do the same thing (hopeful, because then they could see it first hand).  It turned out that Nora had no problems interacting with Nancy and Shannon, and as I watched her perform like a rock star on all of the play tests (even doing things I had no idea she could do) I began to feel a little silly about calling them…like here I was, this paranoid parent, with the above average child, freaking out about nothing.

The final verdict is that we have a child who is either age appropriate or advanced in every area except for her social skills, which are a little bit behind but not enough to qualify for early intervention.  (Nora was 5 points above the cut-off in the social category).

Even if I felt a little silly for calling them to assess my child who is developing just fine, both Nancy and Shannon reassured me that it was good to call, and ultimately I am so glad that I did.  Though we had no concerns about her development it was still really nice and interesting to watch the assessment in action.  The most helpful part though came afterward when I was able to speak with Shannon about my concerns and when she gave me more direction for how I can help Nora to not be limited by her cautious personality.  All along, one of my biggest concerns was that I just don’t know what is the appropriate parenting response when she gets uncomfortable and that I’m afraid I’m making it worse.  After talking to Shannon, I feel a little more comfortable with how I am supposed to respond; I’m sure as I continue to mull over everything that comfort level will increase.

There are some immediate changes I have to make in my parenting, but nothing too drastic. Hopefully once fall rolls around, we’ll have worked through summer crowds and Nora will have spent more time away from me and Chris, she’ll be able to be a little more trusting of others.

I’m sure I will keep you all posted.  Thanks again for caring about Nora and our family.  We really appreciate it.

The post Shyness Update appeared first on Au Coeur.


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